India Metropol

India is organic, dirt sustains every life form, humans included.
A city in India is an Eco-system, a polluted one, where dogs, birds, rats, cows, monkeys, bacterias, men and pests coexists, struggling over the same food, on different layers of waste.
Dirt is not dirt, everything is reused, badly patched, accumulated, overbuild, kept straight till collapse, then burned, took apart or resold.

The presence of trash is different than in the West, here is a valued resource in it's own sense.
The recycling is done directly on the streets by it's inhabitant, what's left and will never be useful it's thrown anywhere in the city outskirts, which eventually in ten years will be the city center.

Everything expands and rots, entropy rules.
The power of heat and water, of seeds wind and masses of inhabitants bends life in the city.

Entropy, the cyclical nature of things roots the passivity of the indian mind to a non lasting reality, religion celebrates this trend and dictates who can enjoy what.
Technology brings no systematic organization and fatalism is the most popular attitude : if your present is worthless you are deserving it and it's going to be so, till you suffered enough through eternity.

In India we experience a subtle or dramatic crysis, because of dirt and death, and people everywhere peeking at our difference, wanting to be friends, cheat or chat, are not of our culture.
We forgot what is to work for a meal, we have never seen a dead body, waste belongs to the trashcan.
For us being between so many people is unsettling, in the West we are far more advanced in in one thing: minding our own business.

In front of the Indian massive overflowing of people, screams horns, drums, animals flowers food, fire death and starvation we also feel worthless, most of the self we brought from home is being dismantled by what we see: this ever present ravaging vastness of life, out of our home, out of ourselves.
We adapt in new habits, the self has to react differently to the environment and dangers of foods and crowds, we rely on intuition, or simply let go, do as Indians, we discover new powers in new attitudes, functional unknown parts within us are integrated.
We learn to have less and still have more (hell we are tourists).
In India by dealing with people expectations and fears are deluded or exceeded everyday, and so let go off, we don't know when we will win and mostly we loose.

We travelers are wonderful personalities, we can blow an Indian mind as they can blow ours whit simplicity and love.

What is there to learn and what is there to give?

Change might happen within us......then people will smile.

I fear the feathers

blown in by your wind

they are white and spinn

laying at last

on the black soil

of my hidden mind

About Zeitgeist

Is my blogger home page in finnish? who knoooows..

anyways I just finished watching zeitgeist on google video, I was amazed, emptied, surprised, impressed, convinced, doubtfull and then I just told myself that my freedom depends only on me and if anyone could be that evil there must be a positive counterpart.

Yes we are being conditioned for a pourpouse or another, but we are rather a poutpourri than droids.

We cannot split events this way even with all the factual thruts in the world, because life is not about factual events but as it says at the beginning of the movie, is about here and now.

We can be as fucked up as we want but the beautiful rave of beeing well be one, becoming all the time, even if we let our present be hell even if we don't aknowledge it and endlessly worry about waths around us, being doesen't stop.

Who you are deep within, who you bless with your presence and space reconnecting whit all there is means  thruly living, allowing the most radiant change of your sorroundings  catalized by itself through the infinite.

This movie might worry you, chose not to, thats sufference already, just be.

So long

I havent been writing on this blog.

My English is officially rusty, German syntax pretends to give order to my sentences, a unripened Spanish wanna get in the way, after spell check the evaluation is: Disastruous.

Well i'll keep on:

I'am now living in barcelona, yes europe most popular choice whit london i guess.

I was actually planning to go to india but I didn't get as close as checking for an airplane that i was already planning my offensive to this next portual town.

I am still so blessed that I can live close to the sea.

What am i doing here ?

Looking for a job, I am using the last money ( I lost track of my bank savings) to pay theater lessons which will start on monday.

 I am fucking around playing guitar each fourth day of the week.

In the whole I'm off to a semirelaxed job quest , involving the useless sending of hundreds of CVs and horrifing presentation letters (or even videos) in an Italianized Spanish of the worse sort.

I am having free catalan lessons two days a week for the sake of doing something ugly and train myself to sit on my ass like in the old days at school.

I am checking out tarot cards as often as my empty e-mail box.

The right job will come to me at the right time as Clemont said (he is a genius). 

It's like destiny's wispering in my ear, no try again be patient, not yet, do look still is useless.

Whit MY references I cannot believe is the recession's fault....... in the worse case i'm already fantasizing of going off for Santiago de compostela whit my last 50 euros, becoming a GO GO Dancer or male escort, playing my two chords on the street and climbing up old squats to find a place for the night.

Just relax take it easy, you still got money, a roof over your head food to eat.

The biggest risk is only having to live my attempt to learn spanish and evolve my artistical career and having to call the german guy to go in some holyday village for six months working as an entertainer.

Wow havent thought about it....that's great, i have fantastic options.....

really nothing to loose. 

Still I'd like not to have to do stupid holiday comedy and become a great actor here in spain orjust  attempting to and doing any job aside.

World, Universe, Friends, Family, German guy and everyone I don't know:

THANKS