Yes I did spend my sunday in front of this PC, so what?
Have this been in vain? or was it the only possible way to accumulate frustration and make this new entry possible?
Sorry I hate question marks too, let´s stop bitching.

Yesterday I´ve been springing in the Bar (means filling up fridges, collect empty bottles and so on), is not as honorable as beeing bar keeper and so I began foolishly questioning my amability between the other kids working there.

One of the big needs of humanity is confirmation, means getting aknowledged by other people as beautiful beeings.

How does people sees me, what do they say about me, how do they call me, eventually, in my head:

I´m how I think that other people sees me.

This attachement to this fictious unstable doubly filtered image (me acting, you feedback to me, me interprets,me acting consequently) make rise this kind of negative thought:

Does nobody likes me anymore?

Suddenly people is tacitly bearing your presence for theyr own practical sake

You feel guilty about something you must have done

At last you are disgusted by their posing, and you know they are not worth the real you.

Ha ha ha... The real you!, the real me, if I could only feel it I would not bullshit myself so much.

In my relations a huge percentage of my sentences are brought on and motivated as stimuli to further feedbacks that can describe my presence from the point of view of the interlocutor.

Altough analitical, my capacity of interpretation is well limited, I always go too far, I´m not in the mind of my interlocutor, and even if I was gifted with telepathy I´m sure it would be a big complication.

What´s behind all this?

I want to be cool I want the world to love me, I want to be the only child that humanity has ever beared.

Is that a problem Doc?